midnight thoughts in NY

Its the second night in my new place!! Yay I feel so independent so free. And then I'm reminded that I'm not there yet. I don't pay my own bills I don't have a steady source of income I'm not in school yet. What am I really doing? I decided to just sit on my fire escape and watch people, have lives know people enjoying themselves. And I wish it was me. I want to go out have fun and meet people. I tried today in fact. As I was walking around and getting food. I talk to people but nothing major met some neighbors in my building seem normal. Or as normal as you can be in NYC without killing a person. Met a guy is really nice, so I'm just enjoying things as they come. And soon hopefully I can be that girl with a good friends and not druggies like I had b4. NYC is my new home, I don't want to regret my move here or having my mother shovel money out to help me. There are so many other paths I could have gone. I just hope I can stick to this one for a while.

The Holidays At Home..

I spent the holidays in the states, it felt weird. having my family around. I was missing Africa a lot, i keep in touch with them and check on how the kids are and what is going on at the school occasionally but it is hard because internet is hard to come by for the cost and all. I miss my Swahili lessons from my little 10 year old brother.

these past weeks i have been just kind of down because when i look out my window i see snow and not a banana tree or wild dogs running around or hear a rooster and sheep in the early hours. Just snow and cold weather reports. I have no more long walks around my village talking to others or playing with the wild dogs. No more family movie nights or football games to watch wiht my father.

No more father around. it kind of puts things in perspective of having a single mother and kind of being an only child these days.

I have two domesticated pets not the wild dogs that would take me into there pack and follow me to and from school or just play around while i picked fleas off another.

I had family, a father a mother two brothers and a sister. i now have 1 cat 1 dog a mother and a older sister living half way round the world. i have alot on my mind around the holidays as it is so having this on top makes things a little crazy. But with the new year i want to stay in touch with my family in Africa. I wish them all well

Returned to the States

So i am Home! the USA that is.

I was sitting on the plane from Arusha to Amsterdam, there was no effect on me that i was really going home. as i waited for my second plane from Amsterdam to the Newark airport. it finally started to sink in that i would not be returning to Africa for a long time, or if at all. i sat on the plane and waited for the take off. I was asleep for most of the flights back home. but i had recurring thoughts of my family in Africa and all that i would miss in the coming weeks.

Just the other day i was doing some chores and i was going to empty and reload the dishwasher....i was in shock that i didn't have to do the dishes by hand. although i wouldn't complain if i did. It was weird having so much more here in the states.

On the Monday after getting home i was talking with my mother about getting a kitten for a while. so when monday came around i decided to start the hunt to find the perfect kitten for my Christmas present.

after being in Africa where pets are not common at all, coming home to a puppy and getting a kitten that are not flea infested and can sleep on your bed and you take care of is great.
so now i have come to relize how much i love animals. From here i will be doing an internship in, NYC working with Art Start a creative center for the underprivileged youths. So i look forward to working in the city and hope that more opportunities come up after i finish my travels.

I am not done yet.

how do you say goodbye?

i finally found internet after my blackberry decided that nolonger will it work. oh well, i can survive.

so my last week with my family (the safari family that is) was not so eventful i played wiht the 6 dogs and the one puppy, relaxed with my thoughts and packed my things for Zanzibar. i think i can say that was very stressful and i knew that my bags would be over weight so i decided to make it three bags instead of 2. BIG MISTAKE!

it has yet to really hit me that i am not going back to my families and that i will not be seeing my brotehrs and sisters forever (hopefully not so). so much of my happiness through thses months was wiht them and the great adventures and laughs we experienced together. i can never forget that and they are my second family that i will always love and hold cloose to my heart.

i have so many photos that i cant wait to share. and i also have so many gift for family and my families here have tought me so much wisdom tha ti want to share it.

i may have also found my true passion which is for animals, as i have said i played wiht the 6 flea infested dogs and i have a story of one of the.

so there are 6 dogs at the safari house,

1-prince
2-bubbie!
3-tips (puppy)
4-old man
5-rascal
6- no name given

so my favorite ones that i useually played with was prince,bubbie, and tips. so one day i decided tha ti needed to check on my secondary project taht many people and freiends help make happen (THANK YOU!). so as i was heading out of the front gate, one of the sleepy dogs woke up and followed me out. Prince, was usually always up early and headed out when i did, so it was not unusual. but after leaving the front gate and heading to my main road, he continued to follow, untill he finaly layed down at oen point did i think ok he will only go this far. so i kept walking up to the main road to meet a fellow intern to walk to school with. but before i was at the road, i heard a little pitter patter of feet behind me and low and behold was prince, rubbing against my leg and nibbiling my ankles. we walked from the main road wiht my fellow intern to the school wiht prince right on my side and the occasional stop and sniff. it was the sweetest thing that he did.

any way, i have too many thoughts on all that i have enjoyed while beiong here that i can not share them all at this one time. But i will say that being in Africa for these three months has made such a great inpact on me that i shall never forget it nor shall i ever want to. I will say that i hope to come back and see my families some day and have the same great time that i have had here now.

I will always have a home here they tell me and that if i do come back that i always have a becd to sleep in and food to eat for free.

18 days till im in the USA

Yeah, it is starting to hit me that I'm leaving soon, I said good bye to my students and it was sad cause we just started to enjoy each other out side of the class room. We had fun and played games but I didn't have enough time to really see the children out side of the teaching zone. I got hugs and good byes from them, I will miss them. But now I have to grade over 100 exam papers for math, so far the 11 that I started with nobody got more than 8 points total out of 100 possible points. I wanted to cry. Today I played with the dogs and sat with them in the rain, I enjoy having them around they are sweet, although the kids here may think I'm a little nutty cause they have fleas and ticks, but I take a shower here an actual shower.

Did I mention I switched families, this one is very american sonon stop water internet etc.

So I'm sad to leave my baba godfrey not my new family since I'm only here for 9 more days or so. I can't wait to go home though, but I'm almost reluctant to want to get on the plane, my family here is soo kind and sweet that Africa has become my home. I'm in such like a mode here that I feel like I belong here I may have to come back soon.

18 days till im in the USA

Yeah, it is starting to hit me that I'm leaving soon, I said good bye to my students and it was sad cause we just started to enjoy each other out side of the class room. We had fun and played games but I didn't have enough time to really see the children out side of the teaching zone. I got hugs and good byes from them, I will miss them. But now I have to grade over 100 exam papers for math, so far the 11 that I started with nobody got more than 8 points total out of 100 possible points. I wanted to cry. Today I played with the dogs and sat with them in the rain, I enjoy having them around they are sweet, although the kids here may think I'm a little nutty cause they have fleas and ticks, but I take a shower here an actual shower.

Did I mention I switched families, this one is very american sonon stop water internet etc.

So I'm sad to leave my baba godfrey not my new family since I'm only here for 9 more days or so. I can't wait to go home though, but I'm almost reluctant to want to get on the plane, my family here is soo kind and sweet that Africa has become my home. I'm in such like a mode here that I feel like I belong here I may have to come back soon.

Rainy day

I got up late today :-( not a good start so I was rushing out the door, when I realized that there was RAIN. Grabbed a cup of tea and tried to drink it but instead I burned my lounge :-(. Hurried to school only to find that I really didn't need to be here! because I didn't have an exam to watch over and It was very slow with students too. So now I'm sitting in the teachers room alone walked into classes but not much I can do. Its poring rain and there is gross flying magit things all around and Frogs all around. Two things I do not like. I'm cold, maybe ill run to get my other jacket and a cup of tea.... I only live across the street. Well in the mean time I am reading and watching some weird news thing. I bought some gifts the other day and today I go back to pick up some more things. I'm so lonely my baba is hard at work I will survive. I think I will fetch my jacket and some food. Yay!