How Do You Say Goodbye....

When i found out my grandmother had cancer, i was upset and didn't want her to have to go in that way, with pain or treatment. My mother todl me they weren't going to do anything and that they just wanted to make her as comfortable as they could. I was in great relief. There are so many things that my grandmother had done for me. she took me for a tiem in the summer at her place in Texas let me eat corn dogs for 2 weeks straight when i saw her, went to pick apple on trees in the yard. Sat on a swinging bench in the front of her house. she told me stories tha ti cant recal now, but as a child i thought the world of them. as a tiny glimpse into what she was like as a child my age or what fund adventures she did. I would sneek gum away from my grandfather cause i wasn't allowed to have any back then. i would rummage through all her drawers and play with the cats. Go swimming with her at her water aerobics class. All of these3 great memories and now she can barely remember my name or who any of her own kids are....How are you supposed to say goodbye, when you have already said it many times over. All i can do now is remember her how she was when she was younger adn i was too also how she use to tell me that no matter what she would always love me.

My grandmother and my mother both have told me about how it was growing up, what they use to do for fun back int eh day. Back then to me seems alot simpler than it is these days and some part of me wishes i was living back then to see and experience the simplicity and the relaxed days in a way. For me this era is a huge change and all the technology we have makes life a lot harder and less memories to be had, cause everybody is on a phone or a tablet no face to face time. we are all glued to computers or tvs or tablets. what ever the case we don't see each other face to face and see the small things in each other that we use to. I always say this but i was born in the wrong era.